blogging block

So it has been a long time since I blogged...in english or in portuguese. I have blogging block. I sit down to write and then go blank...what the stink am I going to write about? My doctor told me that pregnant women get very creative, and many artists best works come when they are pregnant. I don't think those hormones have quite kicked in yet.

Last week was Zeph's 2nd birthday. I planned a big party, then cancelled, we were going to go to the zoo, cancelled that. We ended up taking Zeph to the mall to play at the game store that had very few things for toddlers to play with. But the big pool with little balls was a big hit. Then I made cupcakes and we had one other family over, which was perfect. Zeph was really excited even though he didn't really understand, he knew that everything was ALL ABOUT HIM, and that was cool.

Isn't it funny how we are ingrained with a selfish desire to be adored? I have to admit, I love it when something is all about me, such a feeling of joy and excitement and love.

That is why it is so difficult for us to take up our cross daily, follow Jesus and make everyday all about Him! We love God. We adore Him. Yet we love ourselves more. There is the exception when we really meet God and are filled with the same joy and excitement and love because we are adoring our Jesus. But if I really ask myself to be honest, I often seek that experience so that I can feel good, not because my sole purpose is to glorify Him...so I am still selfishly seeking. Is there really a way to not be selfish?

I don't think we can really rid our flesh of its selfishness, but what we can do is strive to focus our intentions, our actions, our words, our days on Jesus, on our Creator and slowly we may see that our pleasure seeking is second in regards to our concern for God and His Kingdom.